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20121001
20121031
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COM 25
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English 25
Search Results 0 to 24 of about 25 (some duplicates have been removed)
Comedy Central
Oct 17, 2012 7:00pm PDT
-- central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart. ["daily show" theme song playing] [cheers and applause] captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to "the daily show". my name is jon stewart. my guest tonight filmmaker eugene jarecki. the new movie about the war on drugs. for the many wars america is currently fighting, the along with the war on christmas, war on women and there's one more -- it will come to me. [ laughter ] afghanistan, i think, i don't know. christmas is the big one. obviously tonight was the second presidential debate which i totally watched. [ laughter ] and it's not taking place unti
Comedy Central
Oct 18, 2012 7:00pm PDT
with jon stewart." captioning sponsored by comedy central [theme music playing] >> jon: welcome to "the daily show." my name is jon stewart. we're going to have a nice one for you tonight. from "the new york times" 538 block, statistician all-star nate silver will be joining us on the show. [cheering and applause] and then tomorrow night it's president barack obama. but still... [laughter] these people get to... [cheering and applause]
Comedy Central
Oct 30, 2012 7:00pm PDT
playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome to "the daily show," my name is jon stewart. got a good one for you tonight. our guest gerard butler has a new film "facing mavericks." it's a film following sarah palin around. (laughter) whatever happened to that lady? i don't know. let's begin tonight with last night's presidential debate in boca raton, florida, which is spanish for "rat's mouth." (laur)
Comedy Central
Oct 15, 2012 7:00pm PDT
by comedy central ( theme song playing ) >> jon: welcome to "the daily show." my name is jon stewart. oh, we got a nice one for you tonight! ben affleck, director, actor, writer ben affleck will be joining us with a great new movie "argo." but first. ladies and gentlemen -- (laughter) with just four weeks to go to election day the insurmountable, unblowable lead the that president barack obama enjoyed post-convention -- (laughter) -- has been mounted and moan by mitt romney. (laughter) (laughter) no? (chrs
Comedy Central
Oct 16, 2012 7:00pm PDT
playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: welcome to the daily show. thank you. my name is jon stewart. our guest tonight, very exciting, j.k. rowling will be joining
Comedy Central
Oct 29, 2012 11:30pm PDT
>> jon: that's our show, here it is, your moment of zen. >> what did you think about mitt romney this evening? go? >> i think he was assertive, confident and hungry for the job. >> i found him to be more human and relatable tonig captioning sponsored by comedy central captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) (audience chanting "stephen") >> stephen: welcome to the "report." thank you, ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining us in here out there. i'm sure you can tell by that chanting this crowd has gotten c oshslbmentum. (laughter) ladies and gentlemen, last night was the third and final presidential debate. it threw much-need attention to two key domestic issues, "monday night football" and the national league championship. (laughter) as you remember, folks, the first debate was a blowout win for romney. the second debate-- also happened. (laughter) so let's get the truth of night three in "stephen colbert's debate 2012 coverage." two men, one wheel. who gets to drive us over the cliff? (laughter) (cheers and applause) (cheers and
Comedy Central
Oct 1, 2012 11:30pm PDT
>> jon: and that's our show. by the way, the rest of the schwarzenegger interview is upton web, it is interesting what he said as he was leaving, he said that was great. i will be back. and it was weird. join us tomorrow. here is your moment of zen. >> here is your tip, guys. if you want to prosper in our very competitive society you have to have a nice appearance. if you wear crummy shoes, people notice. when you buy the shoes, pony up and get the best ones you can afford. i have bali shoes from eight captioning sponsored by comedy central ready to go ready to go captioning sponsored by comedy central >> stephen: hey, look at you. come on. welcome to the report! (cheers and applause) good to have you with us. ladies and gentlemen. thank you so much. >> stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! wow. thank you, ladies and gentlemen. good to have you with us. folks, you spoil me. you know, ladies and gentlemen, i am a huge fan of republican vice presidential candidate and jersey boys understudy paul ryan. which is why i am enraged. because t
Comedy Central
Oct 2, 2012 11:30pm PDT
(cheers and applause) >> jon: that's our show. join us tomorrow night at 11:00. senator rand paul will be joining us. here it, is your moment of zen. >> creed front man scott staff on why he's switching his vote from obama to romney this time. >> my heart and soul would really love someone like reagan. y captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> stephen: tonight, should churches endorse candidates? well, can you make an attack ad out of stained glass? (laughter) then, the candidates prepare for tomorrow night's debate. president obama has a whole new set of long pauses to memorize. (laughter) and my guest is univision news anchor jorge ramos. but it's my show so i'm going to call him george raymond. (laughter) the lead singer of creed says he won't endorse president obama! well, that settles it, obama will not win the 1998 presidential election. (laughter) this is "the colbert report" (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: welcome to the "report"
Comedy Central
Oct 3, 2012 11:30pm PDT
>> jon: that's our show. join us tomorrow night at 11:00. bill o'reilly will be in the studio. here it is, your moment of zen. >> we just watched president obama three and a half years. i don't think he's governing this way at all. i think that's why... i think that was going to becaptioning y comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> tonight, mitt romney still trails in the polls! could bit because they contain other choices? then a breakthrough in men's vitality. >> what vagina substitutes we will be throwing footballs through next and my guest is country music legend kenny rogers, i will ask him if those islands in the stream make good tax shelters. and pornographers were caught filming in the cornell university library. clearly, they could not get into the hear extraordinary library. this is the colbert report. captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) ( cheers and applause ) >> colbert: welcome. that is incredible. ladies and gentlemen, thank you. good to have you with us. boy, i can feel the electric
Comedy Central
Oct 8, 2012 11:30pm PDT
>> jon: that's our show. join us tomorrow night at 11:00. here it is your moment of zen. captioning sponsored by comedy central >> tonight the still persecuted minority, don't worry brown people, we'll get back to you. >> then is a candidate's hobby fair game for campaign attacks. well, romney's hobby is campaigning. and my guest former astronaut mark kelley has written a new children's book. good night moon program. it's columbus day, don't another get to infect an indian. -- to infect an indian. this is "the colbert report." (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! >> stephen: thank you, ladies and gentlemen. (cheers and applause) i think you can tell by the energy energy in this room we get it on most every night. (cheers and applause) welcome, welcome to the report. good to have you with us. nation, i am still glowing from last week's runnaway debate victory for mitt romney. he's got the mitt-mentum. the mo-mitt-num. the rom-nentum. there's still no word for it, it's nev
Comedy Central
Oct 9, 2012 11:30pm PDT
(cheers and applause) >> jon: that's our show. tomorrow night magic johnson. here it is, your moment of zen. >> don't say you weren't warned this would happen. captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> stephen: tonight, russia tries to claim the north pole! mr. gorbachev, tear down this narwhal! (laughter) then mitt romney threatens iran. stop your nuclear program or he will cut off your pbs! (laughter) and my guest is music legend and animal rights activist morrissey in his honor, today my interns are free range! (cheers and applause) nasa's "curiosity" rover has found a small shiny object on mars. it's either the top of a giant metal city buried beneath the sand or a screw. (laughter) this is "the colbert report." (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) (cheers and applause) >> stephen: welcome to the "report," everybody, thank you so much for joining us! (cheers and applause) thank you so much, please, nation -- (audience chanting "stephen") thank you
Comedy Central
Oct 10, 2012 11:30pm PDT
( cheers and applause ). >> jon: that is our show. join us tomorrow night at 11:00, the great pta will be joining us. here it is, your moment of zen. >> only pawn in game of life. captioning sponsored by comedy central >> stephen: tonight, our educational problems have new answers which we copied off the chinese kid in front of us. ( laughter ) them our nation's highways are in trouble. someone must have told them they were adopted. ( laughter ). plus my guest naomi wolf has a new book called "vagina." now i'm no english major but i detect a subtle sexual subtex. ( laughter ). the new york aquarium has a new baby walrus-- great, another brooklyn hipster with a ridiculous mustache. ( laughter ). this is the "colbert report." ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen. >> stephen: awfully nice. thank you so much, ladies and gentlemen. welcome to the report, good to have you with us. ( cheers and applause ) ladies and gentlemen, it is kind of that time of year to ask the question is this not-- ( cheers an
Comedy Central
Oct 11, 2012 11:30pm PDT
>> jon: that's our show. here it is your moment of zen. >> there are happy crew members in the international space station this morning. listen, people may not know you >> stephen: tonight, an october surprise that could bring down obama. and a rocktober surprise that could bring jethro tull to your town! [ laughter ] then, it's autumn. don't forget to go outside and watch the beautiful changing of mitt romney's positions. [ laughter ] and my guest, chrystia freeland, says the wealthy are leaving the rest of the world behind. yeah. that's kinda the point. [ laughter ] scientists have found a turtle that pees through its mouth. or has a penis that looks like a face. [ laughter ] this is "the colbert report." [ captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) holy cow. wow. [cheers and applause] ladies and gentlemen, unbelievable. you will not believe -- [crowd chanting stephen] oh, my gosh. thank you. [cheers and applause] welcome to the report, thank you for joining us. i don't -- folks -- i don't know if can tell with a just happened
Comedy Central
Oct 25, 2012 7:00pm PDT
, this is "the daily show with jon stewart."
Search Results 0 to 24 of about 25 (some duplicates have been removed)